Sisterhood46

I have always felt safe when I'm surrounded by people. Mind you I might be standing next to a rapist for all I know, but in general I feel safer when I know there is someone close by. Every Monday night at around 9:00PM, I leave my NYU classroom and walk to Grand Central. It's about a 10 minute walk, I'm alone, it's dark, but I feel absolutely safe. Every Monday night at around 10:30OM, I step off the train and walk to my new home in the suburbs. It's about a 10 minute walk, I'm alone, it's dark, and I feel so vulnerable. So much so, that about 5 minutes into my walk I feel the need to call hubbie to let him know I'm on my way. Why do I feel vulnerable in a place that should in theory much safer than the streets of NYC? Is it because there is absolutely no one else but me walking in the street? Is it because it is soooooo silent that I can hear every single one of my footsteps, every leaf rustle? Is it because there are barely any street lights so the ...

So as you know, everyone drives everywhere in the suburbs. And I mean everywhere. So you would think that they would be pretty decent drivers since they spend so much time behind the wheel. Guess what? It's exactly the opposite. People here have spent so many hours behind the wheel that they are in this sort of coma. None of them pay any attention. None of them use their signals, they just kind of decide last minute to take a turn across four lanes of traffic. I mean this is the most life endangering driving I've ever seen, it even tops the crazy drivers in Bogota, Columbia! It's actually really scary because they're all driving SUVS. I can't tell you the number of women I've seen driving these things and meanwhile they can barely see over the wheel. So they can barely see where they're going but they're on the phone, painting their toenails while driving through a stop sign. It just boggles the mind. The other day I was in the car with all three kids,...

The kids, hubbie and I have just come back from a three daybreak in NYC. We stayed in our old neighborhood. At first I was a little apprehensive that everyone would feel really homesick. In turns out everyone really enjoyed themselves. We had a great dinner with three other families. The kids hung out with their friends, I shared a much needed drink with the other moms. It was so much fun. The kids' table made Animal House look tame but apart from that it was great. We went to our favorite restaurants, discovered some new one. Braced ourselves against the cold and walked around town. Hubbie and I had a much needed date night at Nobu. Our old babysitter came to our hotel to look after the kids. When we got home this afternoon, I asked the kids how they felt about the trip. They both said that they had a great time and that they miss NYC. But to my great surprise they also said that they liked Westport. They like the freedom of being able to go for a bike ride with the neighbors by ...

As you all know for most of my life, I've had a long term, fully committed relationship with urban spaces. I was born in Paris, I had my first job in NYC, had my first child in London. I've slept, worked, socialized, mothered, lived in an urban environment. When we considered leaving NY I really felt like I was going to suffocate. I mean that in a very physical sense. I think my hubbie truly understood that. So the solemn promise he made to me when we decided to move out here, was that whenever I needed a dose of the city, I just had to hold up my hand and he would take over the house and the three kids. He promised, he said to me over and over "just say the word and off you go." I know, it sounds too good to be true. I've raised my hand three times in the last couple of months and this is what happened. On Friday afternoon I wrote hubbie an e-mail that basically said, "I need to go." The next morning I got up, put on my favorite clothes, waved goodbye ...

Yesterday someone shared this saying with me and it rang so true I wanted to share it with you. "You can't always have the things you love, but you should always love the things you have." For me it means that I can't have the city life I love but I certainly can love the life have with my family in our beautiful new house.

You know when my sister-in-law who lives in the suburbs, used to come and visit us in NYC she was always amazed that a family of five could live in a two bedroom, two bath apartment. I truly believe that a) she felt sorry for us and b) couldn't think of a worse fate. I always used to say that small space is just city living. You don't have an extra bedroom, you don't store stuff from 10 years ago and you basically become an expert at maximizing the space that you do have. And to be honest I was happy with that. The fact that our place was small forced us to take full advantage of the city because we went a little stir crazy if we stayed home too long. So now we're in the burbs and we have space. What's it like? Is it worth moving out here for the space? Keep in mind that moved here a mere two months ago so things will evolve, but here's where we stand. We have enough bedrooms for the three kids to have their own. So far Bella has her own bedroom but the boys wh...